THE CORNETTE CONVERSATION Interview with Jim Cornette

Instead of his regular column, a trip to the UK gave Brian Elliott the chance to shoot the breeze with Jim Cornette about such diverse subjects as his fear of flying, the Glaswegian accent, and Kevin Sullivan stabbing a Japanese wrestler in an infamous smw angle.

FSM: You have a known hatred of flying, but you made it here to the UK. Was it as traumatic as you thought it’d be?
Jim Cornette: I was almost glad to get on the plane after what we had to go through to get there (laughs). We’d been putting together this tour for months, but I’d told the guys that we can’t fly from Chicago or Cincinnati because of the weather; I wanted to come from Atlanta, because there’d be no possibility of trouble with snow. Then, two weeks before we were set to leave, they had a freak snowstorm and shut the whole city down. People were on the highway for 24 hours, and kids were sleeping on school buses.
Inside, I thought, “Great!” because there was no way it could happen again in the time before we set off. The day before the flight, it was 60o – it was so hot that my friend said he had his window open – but there was an incoming snowstorm warning, and on our drive there, they’d already cancelled the flight for the next day! There was an ice storm, so there was that on top of three inches of snow, and we had to stay in a hotel instead of with my friend, because we were at least close to the airport. I found out that nobody on the British Airways 800-number speaks English; they’re in Bombay somewhere (laughs).
Finally, it did thaw out, and we were able to get our flight. It was supposed to be 60o again two days later, so the one day in 20 years I used that airport... (pauses) They called it “the mind-boggling snowstorm of the century” – something that never happens, but it did, ’cos I was there.
I slept good on the flight, apart from nearly breaking my wife’s hand in the turbulence. I went back to sleep and the next thing I knew, we were landing. We’ve been having fun since then.

I’ll not hold you to it, but it sounds like you’d contemplate coming back.
I really want to, even just on vacation. On the way down from Glasgow, where the sheep are on those stone bridges and old stuff like that... (pauses) I’ve been wearing everybody out just by praising that. Stonework like that is like buying gold in the States these days, and I just love the way it looks. I’m not much for the cities, but I love the countryside, especially when there are no cars coming at me, because that whole “wrong side of the road” deal is still freaking me out. I’d love to be in a quiet B&B somewhere with no phones, just reading and taking pictures.
The only drawback was that I ended up pretty sick after the show in Birmingham, and I was worried about my voice, so Alex Shane booked me into a walk-in clinic. At home, you’d be in there with hookers and junkies, and if you had a 10am appointment, you’d be seen at quarter to 12. But I walked right in, and the guy looked at me and gave me the same shit my wife had gotten a few weeks ago when she started to get sick. The medicine cost £23 total; the same shit that would’ve cost over $200 in America. I took it on Friday and was in bed all day, and by Saturday morning, I felt better. I've never had shit work this quick on me in my life (laughs). I need to mail order my medicine from over here next time!

Just as you mention about nearly losing your voice, have you ever had problems from all the shouting and screaming on TV?
Oh god, I had a bunch of trouble around eight or 9 years ago when I was doing the OVW commentary and writing their TV. I wouldn’t get a lot of sleep, and suffered from bad acid reflux anyway. Yelling didn’t help, but the doctor stuck the camera down my throat and said I didn’t have cancer or anything like that, but my vocal chords were inflamed. He told me to get plenty of rest, to stay away from stress, spicy food and all that shit, and haven’t had so much of a problem since, except when I have a cold.

Your fast-talking is a trademark, but so are your glasses. Have you ever considered changing them?
No. Stacey got me smaller ones, but I could see the rims all the way around... (pauses) When I get something I like, I never change it, like the stuff I like to eat, the stuff I like to drink, glasses, clothes, whatever. I don’t change shit I like unless they quit making it.
When I was having physical therapy on my hip from all those bumps over the years, the guy said the big leather high-tops I had were the worst ones I could wear. So, I picked up some lighter, smaller shoes, but I have flat feet, and in Connecticut I started to wear dress shoes to the office, and I would get up in the morning and be hardly able to walk. So I got these big Nike hiking boots and my feet quit hurting, but then they stopped making them, so I found where they sold their remaining stock to this big warehouse, and I bought a dozen pairs. So from 1997 until about a year and four months ago, I wore the same kind of shoes every day – I just went through the dozen pairs.

Your first tour date was in Glasgow. How did you handle the accent?
You know, it wasn’t too bad (laughs). On-stage, the speakers were pointing out to the crowd, and between that and my bad ear, it was actually harder to hear than it was to understand. I lost a few folks around the bend a bunch of times, but Kenny McIntosh from Inside The Ropes was there to interpret.

The interesting thing about the ICW promotion in Scotland is that it doesn’t solely draw from wrestling fans. It’s like a youth culture movement.
I can see that, and they’re doing a great job. There were a ton of ICW t-shirts around, and they had a lot of fans there for the burger-eating contest we did.

You write so much great, varied stuff for your regular FSM column, so does it ever bother you to get asked the same questions about Vince Russo, that are designed to get a reaction from you?
Well, no – he’s kind of my Lex Luthor (laughs). Everybody wants to hear about it, but I feel bad because I’m telling some of the same stories over and over, but that’s sometimes what people want to hear.
Nobody ever sticks up for him, and I might get upset if they did – I’d wonder what was wrong with society (laughs). Everyone wants to hear me call him a son of a bitch and a numbnuts, because they think the same thing. I’m happy to oblige people that feel the same way I do.

When was the last time you talked to Bobby Eaton, Dennis Condrey, or Stan Lane?
I talk to Dennis once a month – he’s hilarious. Bobby I spoke with a few weeks back, and he should be good to go for the Mid-South Wrestling reunion. I talked with Stan before Christmas last year; he really doesn’t want to do any wrestling appearances, other than possibly Greg Price’s FanFest in Charlotte, but the first weekend of August is always his biggest boat race of the year, and so he’s never able to get the day off.
Stan felt out of love with the business. He was in love with it, but after he’d done it, he’d done it. He was doing fine on commentary in the WWF, but Jerry Jarrett got him in, and when Jerry left, it was Kevin Dunn and the rest of them... (pauses) Stan didn’t want to live up in the Northeast anymore, which affects everybody. People have moved from the north to the south, like it, and will stay. Folks who move from the south to Connecticut hate it, and can’t wait to get out.

Do you ever wonder what might’ve happened if Dennis hadn’t gone AWOL?
At this point, I almost wonder if what happened wasn’t the better thing, because pay-per-view was starting to come in, and Stan Lane was more cosmetically pleasing, to use the proper term. So, I divide it like this: when we were the main event team, and supposed to be selling tickets and just have heat, heat, heat, Dennis was the guy. Later on, when we were in the spot of not carrying the show but having the [best] match of the show, and people started liking us because we were flashy, Stan was perfect. Everyone was happier with the way everything worked out in the end.

One question I’ve never heard you asked regards the Smoky Mountain show where Kevin Sullivan stabbed Yukihiro Kanemura multiple times with a spike. What happened there?!
Victor Quinones, who was involved in the Puerto Rican promotion for so long, was also booking guys over there for the W*ING promotion. Kevin Sullivan worked with them, and he said guys like Bill DeMott and Miguel Perez Jr. were coming over to do some other shows. He said (imitates Sullivan), “This kid – he can get my spike over, bruddah.”
So we had them come in, and DeMott and Perez had a great match, and then comes time for Kevin to work with Kanemura. He gave him the spike and the kid bladed his arm, but it didn’t bleed, even though he’d cut it real deep. He had to go the hospital, so here’s this Japanese kid, going to a hospital in the sticks in Virginia, with a language barrier. They asked him what happened, and he said (mimics voice) “Sullivan spike me!” On TV, we had to put a big “X” over the screen, because it was so nasty. I thought it’d be a little like the old Sheik business, but the kid performed a goddamn lobotomy on his arm. It actually looked worse with the big red “X” over it; it didn’t look nearly as bad as when Sullivan took the spike to Brian Lee, who gigged his head and bled a lot. That looked like he was being massacred.

One of the most interesting characters you were ever involved with was Bruiser Bedlam, who later bombed a police station and still has first-degree murder charges pending. How did he get involved with Smoky Mountain?
I had seen him when he was still wrestling as Johnny K-9. The guy was so strong, he’d been around a while, he could work a little bit and he could move around, and I wondered why nobody was using him. I pitched him to come down to Knoxville, and he said, “Sure, yeah Jimmy!” He was a fun guy, always cheerful, and he’d always wanted a spot, so he would actually drive down from Ontario to Tennessee every other weekend or so. Regardless of what the weather was, he’d show up with no shirt on and the top off his jeep (laughs).
I knew he’d been in prison, because of his [biker gang] tattoos and the stories he told, but I didn’t know he was still actively associating with those folks. It wasn’t like he wanted to; he said it was more a case of not being able to get rid of them once you’re around them. You don’t tell them you don’t want to play anymore.
He was very loyal; if a friend of his had a problem with somebody, they had a problem with him, too. Apart from the murder charges, he was great (laughs). He was legitimate, too; we took him into the gym and shot videos of him benching 580lbs, breaking bottles over his head and all that shit. We didn’t really have to gimmick him.

Tell me something I don’t know about Jim Cornette.
I love small animals, but I don’t have any pets, because we moved into a house with a new carpet and polished hardwood floors. My house is like a museum; every room has a theme, and we collect everything.
I’m definitely a dog person, because cats just aren’t personable enough. That goes back to the first dog I ever had, which was my dad’s Cocker Spaniel, but I’ve also had Dalmatians, Dachshunds, a stray mixed Beagle and West Highland Terriers when I lived in Charlotte. I’ve had mice, rats, birds – I like anything with feathers or fur, because I’m not big on scales (laughs).
We had a Puggle show up in the yard one day, in the cold weather, and we took him in so he wouldn’t freeze. We were going out of town the next day, so we left him at the vet to see if anybody was looking for him, but if not, we were gonna keep him as I kinda fell in love with him. But when we got back, his owner had claimed him.
I’m a sucker; I don’t like people, but I love animals. At least they don’t actively piss you off, although that Puggle did have the bladder the size of a fuckin’ drum.